Im sitting most days,
Not knowing myself,
Lost and confused,
Heating my internal conflict.

For love I say is bull shit,
And in that, I do not believe,
Still I read a mills and boons,
Hypocrisy or denial? Which is it?

Now I hear her cry,
So deep her wounds have traced,
And yet she says shell stand it out,
In the name of love – all justified.


But I question?
In the name of love – he makes her cry,
On the phone, i hear her sigh!
A little bit of me is beginning to die.

Her pain and sorrow, yet rings in my ears,
Hours after, I thought she rationalized,
Now shes messages, shell stand it out,
In the name of love – is all justified?

Every tear, every bloody drop,
Every heart wound, ever self confidence blow,
And yet she says “ he needs me now”
With disabled hand, I just cant stand.

If I must do, do must I what?
For respect her decision, shes an adult,
Making her decision, abiding by them,
In the name of love its all bullshit.

But I must wait, and battle with myself,
For her decisions, will always be backed by me,
But still I cant stop worrying,
A little of me is still dieing.

Then comes the if, the buts, and the you never know,
Im contemplating, all possible roots for her,
Yet she stays with the man who makes her cry,
In the name of love – is it all justified?

My conflict begins, for in love I disbelieve,
But mountains have moved, and wars have been won,
With love in the mind, heart and soul,
And still my mind conflicts – in the name of love is it all justified?

Lost in my head, my exteriors reflect not,
Its eating me Inside, but strong I must stand,
The walls of distance have grown to tall,
The sense of comfort has forever been lost.

So now I sit, fighting to battles,
Give me some beer, I want to drown these ashes,
I must fight, I must wait,
But the question remains – in the name of love is it all justified?

Labels: Conflict, Internal conflict, poems